EX-Porn Star Danielle’s Story: How I Got out of the Porn Industry


Hi Everybody!

Again, I’m putting another disclaimer for this post. It’s quite heavy and yet mind-blowing. It is definitely for an 18+ audience with graphic details so please watch at your discretion. It is mature subject matter and yet I feel for those that struggle with watching Porn, this video testimony might enlighten you, for those that know of anyone thinking of going into this industry or are in it, know that you can get out of it and that you don’t have to stay there, whether you’re a guy or girl.

Danielle William’s Story

When I first watched Danielle’s story, I was heart-broken and yet sobered up by the realities of other peoples struggles. Her testimony sheds light on how women see themselves, what addictions are and how such places as the Porn industry work to ruin lives of those who watch it and also those engaged in the industry. The Devil is real people. What I found interesting in her testimony is how many people who participated in watching porn were also the very same who would pay to have porn-stars like Danielle and or prostitutes as their personal escort were also “Christian” men in the Church. Now, I know we have a lot of people in the world who struggle with Porn, but we can’t act like it’s not in our back yard. What I also love about her testimony is that she explains how she still felt she was a Christian even though she wasn’t living up to the standards of her beliefs. God revealed to her the truth of what she was living through and how “Money” played a big role in her continuing to be a Porn Star. Money became her God and this led her to be trapped for a time in this dangerous and risky business. She explains the role that STD’s and AIDS plays out in the industry and she also explains how much women make versus what men make in the industry.

Watch her video

After watching it, I thought to myself that Pornography is definitely the devil’s play ground. Although I was exposed to it at the age of 5, I felt that the pictures were rather degrading and evil. Women are not creatures with insatiable desires as these pictures depict and it is no wonder why some young ladies dress up scantily clad trying to imitate these pictures just to get a guy to “notice” them. Their self image in these pictures and videos sell an idea that assumes you have to do these things to get noticed, to get appreciated to get validated as an attractive woman and to get “loved”. These are definitely lies from the pits of hell being fed into especially young minds of young girls and boys that need to be dismantled. Ladies, I’m here to tell you that God didn’t design you to be this way.God created every person to be fearfully and wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.

Virtue should be your mantle and not these scandalous and dangerous activities. It is easy to land in these places and you’ve got to wonder, is it such a mystery as to why some men and women struggle with bulimia, anorexia nervosa, self-injury, suicidal thoughts, drugs, alcohol etc  to numb the pain when they are bombarded with magazines,  television, advertisements in different forms of social media that depict images of what an ideal man or woman should be by the world’s standards? No, it is not a mystery and yet things like Pornography which is a mutli-billion making industry fuel these ideas by those fueled by greed, money and lust at the expense of our generations losing their self-worth and identity. We are losing generations folks, to perversion and violence and the more we hide it under the rug, the more we allow for this culture of genocide to continue. That’s right, you read correctly when I said a “Culture of genocide”. I know using the term genocide sounds strong, but generations are dying because of how we have allowed for such things to control our society, our families and our children.

We feed addictions at the cost of people’s lives and I find this all to be rather really sad and it grieves my spirit to know that young people can’t talk about this stuff freely because of ridicule and condemnation, especially those that are in the church. It is yet another hush hush topic and some are afraid of being judged in a Christian circle because of the high standard expected of young people. The ‘I’m a Christian and yet I struggle with watching porn” isn’t something someone wants to testify let alone admit to because of the thought of, “What’s wrong with me?…I know that it’s wrong but I can’t seem to stop”.

People, it’s a serious stronghold that needs to be broken with much deliverance and healing and EDUCATION.

Christian or no Christian, Porn has it’s own demons and it doesn’t discriminate on who its victims are…you can be a Christian and watch it and you can be a Non-believer and watch it, but the effects of Porn remains the same. It breaks people’s spirits, it breaks relationships and peoples marriages. Let me just say that men aren’t the only participants who watch it, young girls do too from the ones I’ve talked too, but they are ashamed to reveal that because of the social stigma that places women at a higher standard than men to be participating in these activities. I’m here to tell you that women watch Pornography just as much as men do, but many books always focus on men’s issues regarding it because we know it’s an obvious area that targets men, but trust me when I say that there are a lot of closet women who do watch it too and it is no wonder why there is a rise in pre-marital sex, there is a rise of single-mothers all because Sex has been perverted by this industry (as a factor but not the only reason) that thrives to drive people away from what God intended sex to be for which is for the sacred institution of Marriage with One Man and One Woman – just to make that clear.

My abuser obviously had a problem with Porn and she was a woman…a “Christian” one at that… so don’t assume that I’m only talking to men who watch it because women do too and for different reasons. For men it maybe more for physical release whereas for women it maybe more for emotional release.  I won’t profess to be an expert on this topic, but I’m just laying out my opinions. I’d be very interested to hear other people’s feed back on this so please by all means comment below and let’s have a discussion.

For the men that watch it, I’m not here to condemn you at all about those that watch it, but understand how you viewing it continues the violence that these young women experience. There has been research to support that most sexual offenders imitate what they have seen in Porn videos and afflict the same activities on their victims. Sex Trafficking is a major issue in foreign countries and it is also happening in our back yards which is also another arm to fuel the Porn industry. Men…you have to break the cycle if you want to be serious. You must believe that you can overcome the temptation of it all by admitting that you may have a problem and you need some accountability for it. Seek support groups and do what you have to do in order to be set free from the addiction of watching Porn. God want’s you to know that we all have the ability to have self-control and you need to embrace that truth.

2 Timothy 1:7
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and selfcontrol.

Titus 2:12
It has trained us to reject and renounce all ungodliness (irreligion) and worldly (passionate) desires, to live discreet (temperate, selfcontrolled), upright, devout (spiritually whole) lives in this present world,

2 Peter 1:6
And in [exercising] knowledge [develop] selfcontrol, and in [exercising] selfcontrol [develop] steadfastness (patience, endurance), and in [exercising] steadfastness [develop] godliness (piety),

Suffer no delusions and wake up people! You are a victim if you watch it and/or participate in it, but God wants to break these addictions and the only way to be free from them is by confessing it for what it is (Repentance) and then seeking some Godly counsel or some effective support groups to help deal with these issues before they spiral out of control.

Porn effects both men and women, young or old in respect to their self-image.

Remember Danielle’s testimony and realize that this industry affects how we view ourselves for those  of us who are in the Body of Christ. I encourage everybody to do some serious soul searching and some real-talk about this issue with some support system and accountability partners so that we break the cycle of self-abuse and continual abuse-by-proxy by continuing to watch Porn that affect the people who participate in the industry. Spread the word and feel free to share this post if you think it will help somebody.

Danielle is an amazing conqueror and overcomer as an EX-Porn star that has battled her demons in this evil industry and she is a living testimony that you can be set free from the stronghold of the Porn industry and from Pornography.

The glamor of it all is false and it’s amazing how young ladies are suckered into this place driven by lust and money. Guard your children parents! Vigilance is key here especially in their formative years. Consider that Men, if you don’t show the proper respect you have for your wives and daughters…your children will look elsewhere for some validation. God forbid if they land in this industry that may cater to their emotional needs not being met or other perverse avenues. Mothers, your sons need to be taught how to respect women by you being an example that is attractive to follow. A women of virtue is definitely a Proverbs 31 woman. They need to respect you at home and Fathers need to train men in the way they should go so that they don’t depart from your wisdom.

Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.

Ephesians 6:4
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Do not judge your children harshly if you find out that they do in fact struggle with Porn or drugs or whatever addiction. The last thing a child wants to hear after they confess their issues is utter condemnation from their parents…this continues to facilitate their silence. Be open and discuss openly rather than fueling their silence to their struggles with your criticism. Ask yourself how would Jesus address the issue, with Love? or Condemnation? You play such a vital role in a Child’s life and freedom comes in an environment where love surrounds them and cultivates a safety net where they are free to express themselves without fear of condemnation. You can shut a child down by condemning words rather than with compassion.

Well that’s all I have to say  on this topic so I hope this post blesses somebody today and may Truth break the silence.

I recommend Sister Res’s blog for more information regarding information on the topic of sexual abuse. She has amazing posts that have ministered to my spirit. I totally recommend them.

Articles of interest from her blog are:

Sex Trafficking from the 13th Floor

The Bible and Child Sexual Abuse I

The Bible and Child Sexual Abuse II

I also Recommend these Resources via http://therproject.org/wp/cornerstone-church/fighting-for-purity/:

ONLINE RESOURCES

X3 watch – FREE. X3 watch sends fortnightly reports to 2 email buddies with questionable sites visited. It also says when the system has been turned off. (works on computer and even handheld devices!)

Covenant Eyes – Covenant Eyes Software provides Internet Integrity with accountability reports.

XXXchurch.com Don’t let the name put you off! This site is doing a great job at fighting for purity online. Very good advice for parents + links to some more helpful sites.

FREE EBOOKS

Porn Again Christian – Mark Driscoll

RECOMMENDED BOOKS

Every Man’s Battle by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker

Sex is Not the Problem, Lust Is by Joshua Harris

Sexual Detox: A Guide for Guys Who are Sick of Porn by Tim Challies

To Finish off, I also have a Song from J.R. called Temptations. May this song Minister to you today.

God bless you Everybody!

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The Heart of Gratitude


I was thinking a lot for the things that I am grateful for when I looked at the things that others do not have. It is easy to become jealous of others blessings and totally miss the fact that what we currently have is more than what others have by a large percentage. This is all about changing our perspective on life to see things in a different light when we walk in that path of Humility. I would definitely recommend reading Tarisai’s post regarding the subject of Wisdom in Humility: Defining Real Humility to get some background on what it is so that you understand why it is needed to cultivate a heart of Gratitude. He uses a window-mirror analogy that speaks volumes of how we see ourselves when faced with a problem. Which side of the coin are we sitting on?

We have to explore having a heart filled with Gratitude for even the smallest of things but it is typically the smallest of things that make the largest difference.

Let’s start with something fundamental such as poverty. How many of us are actually grateful that we even have a roof over our heads? You are rich if you have a $1.00 bill or coin in your pocket because there are countries in this world that live below $1.00 by a large margin.  In Bolivia, it was reported in 2009 that  30.3% of people live below the poverty line living with only USD$2.00/day or less. In Canada (2008) we have 9.4% of people that live below the poverty line; the USA has 15.1%  in 2010; Trinidad and Tobago at 17%  in 2007; the Gaza strip (2009) has 70% ; Liberia is 80%  in the year 2000; Malawi at 53% in 2004; Mozambique at 70% in 2001; Nicaragua at 48% in 2005 and the list goes on. I think you get my point now.

We can look at different stats using UN reports and many other sources but what I’m driving at here is that we have a tendency to overlook the things we currently have and grumble at our neighbours for possessing the latest new gaget we don’t have or the new car that they just bought and forget that we truly have it better than most in this world.  When will we get to that point where we stop with the mindless ingratitude and Thank GOD for what we have? We obviously have to shift our FOCUS.

My Grandparents always taught me that the two most important phrases you must learn in this life are Please and Thank You.

Gratitude is not just a word of thanks but it’s also an attitude.

It’s very easy to miss opportunities if we grumble and look jealously at our peers for what they have in comparision to what we have. This includes when we receive things from others; you may not always get the things that you want because you could be receiving things that you need and it is easy to despise the gift that is given if we are driven by desire rather than necessity.  I am speaking yet again from experience in that I have seen people given priviledges that are not necessarily deserved and they abuse the gifts that they receive because of that heart of ingratitude. Why do people start to appreciate what they have once it is taken away from them? It’s because they failed to understand that a heart of gratitude is an attitude that appreciates everything and doesn’t take even the smallest of things for granted. People lose out on this principle in all walks of life.

Ask yourself when was the last time you said “Thank You“?

I believe saying “Thank You” should be a daily affair whether you’re Christian or not. You should practice just that small phrase each day if you want to cultivate a heart of Gratitude. Stop looking to the left and to the right and look at what is right in front of you. Shift your Focus off others and FOCUS on yourselfMany people miss this because they have a grumbling attitude that doesn’t see anything apart from what they “wished” they could have instead of looking at what they “already” have.

Thank God that I could live to see another day when the last second could have been somebody elses last breath in this life; Thank God I have a roof over my head while I reflect on others that have no shelter; Thank God I have a car even though there are those that don’t have one and are forced to walk many miles to get to work and back; Thank God I can afford to buy food while others don’t even know if what they have is their last meal; Thank God for every day, hour, minute, second and every moment that you have in this life because I know that for everything that is given, I know that even such things can be taken away so I Thank God for everything I have each day. You don’t have to be Christian to be thankful, you just have to be thankful period. Fill your cup with GRATITUDE and Don’t take life for Granted.   Ask yourself, what have you filled in your cup…is it Jealousy or Gratitude????

Life is a priviledge, it is not a RIGHT.  – OOooohhh I see wide eyes staring back at me with bewilderment. “How can you say that SHERLINE!!!!!!”

When you start to change your perspective on even the basic of things, you will learn what to be thankful for. Remember that you don’t have to be here on this earth right now, but something higher than yourself is allowing you to survive another day. For me it is God, for you…what could it be?

Do NOT be envious of others for what they have.

People can get so caught up with competing with their neighbour that they often breed an attitude of greed and lust(envy and want). You must also consider the ways in which people receive and obtain what they have.  Does the person have what they have through honest means or deceitful means? Think about it. Would you like to be jealous of the rich man that happened to trick his clients out of their entire lifesavings  in order to buy his Condo in Hawaii, or the man who murdered his brother because he wanted his wife, or the girl you stole a Coach brand bag from a presitgious store to look stylish? I know these examples seem extreme but if you knew how people obtained their possessions, would it change your heart of jealousy?

 

 

 

 

 

Also, I think that people shouldn’t be envious of those that prosper by honest means. You don’t know if that person will be the connection in your life that you will need to whom will have the means to help you in your time of trouble. If you treat people who are blessed or possess more than you with disdain, you in fact close the door of a future opportunity. Notice how I said YOU close the door.  Ask yourself, how many doors have you closed because of your ungrateful and jealous attitude?

I also want to make something clear here…there is nothing wrong about yearning for something that someone else has but if that yearning turns into jealousy that’s where you’ve got to stop and seriously do some soul-searching and self-reflections regarding your desires. I spoke about differentiating between a want and a need in a different post which ties in to this whole concept of Gratitude. Having a heart of gratitude is an attitude that nutures an overall appreciation of the priviledges you have in this life. You must get away from thinking you deserve things all the time and start seeing things as priviledges more than a right. We should avoid hoarding even the things we do have because the purpose of having stuff  is in order to enable us to give in the first place and to also produce more of what we have. It is more blessed to give than to recieve (Acts 20:35; Matthew 13:12).

Look at what Paul had to say to the Elders at Ephesus:

Acts 20: 32 – 35

32 “So now, brethren, I commend you to God and to the word of His grace, which is able to build you up and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified. 33 I have coveted no one’s silver or gold or apparel. 34 Yes, you yourselves know that these hands have provided for my necessities, and for those who were with me. 35 I have shown you in every way, by laboring like this, that you must support the weak. And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” (Emphasis added).


Having a heart of gratitude changes how we view what we have. We must view our possessions as gifts that enables us to help others that do not have what we possess. Also, don’t think only of just possessions, but think of the health that you have…someone else could be battling cancer and you aren’t…what will you do to comfort another? Also…do not laugh at others who are disadvantaged…..because if you do…you might end up in their position one day and therefore, you reverse the blessings in your life with that attitude and open up doors to disadvantages in your life. Be careful how you treat others and guard your tongue, guard your heart, and learn to be Thankful. Practice it everyday until it becomes a second-nature attitude and a permanent character.

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